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All amout Me
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Over-reacting [Friday, August 22nd, 2008 @ 10:16pm]
I don't know. Maybe I'm overreacting, but lately I've been feeling unwanted. 

Mom says Katie is dad's favorite, Nikki is obviously mom's, and me? Well, if I felt anyone truely favored me, I wouldn't be writing this entry right now. 

Katie, Krystal, & Ashley obviously favor Nikki because every time she grabs the car keys its 'Where are you going?" "Can I come?". When I leave, it feels like I'm pulling an arm or a leg to get one of them to ride with me to the store. They're always in her room hanging out with her. I do like my privacy, but is it wrong to want somebody to want to be around you?

 It's the same with my mom. Any time she goes anywhere it's "Hey Nikki, wanna run to the store with me?" "Wanna come with to drop the girls off." Yeah, I could always ask to come, but that's what I always do. No one wants me to go anywhere with them (or atleast that's the way I perceive it when they leave without ever asking me) or vice versa.

I don't know. It's sounds like I'm whining, but I'm not the confrontational type of person. Something bothers me and I shut down, afraid of being ridiculed. I try and laugh it off like it means nothing when it means something.

What truly irritates me is...wait, irritate is quite the word I'm looking for...upsets? What truly upset me is being called stupid, retarded, or idiot when I don't get something. We all jokingly say it to each other, but when one of them says it to me, I just want to punch them in the face then run into my room and cry. It seriously upsets me that much, but I don't want to tell them that because I'm afraid they'll laugh it off and tell me to get over it or call me an idiot for even thinking that.

I don't know. I probably won't ever tell them this in person, but I feel better now that I've written this down and gotten it off my chest.
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[Wednesday, August 8th, 2007 @ 12:09pm]
[ mood | tired ]

It's been a while since my last post. A lot has happened since then.

1. I'm 18 as of 4/8/2007!!
2. Got my license.
4. Joined some dating sites just for the hell of it.
6. My favorite teacher died last month, and I was really upset about it, but I'm okay now.

There's more but I can't think of it at the moment. It doesn't really look like that much when I actually list it, but unless you'd actually lived it, you wouldn't know.

I think I might actually start updating this more often. Hmmm...

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It's Been A While [Wednesday, December 27th, 2006 @ 10:58am]
My last post was Dec 10? Damn. Well, a lot has happened.

Dec 11 I went to an MCR/AFI/Taking Back Sunday/Unwritten Law/The Living End concert. It was pretty sweet. I'm not a huge fan of AFI, but they put on the best performance I think. It was quite amazing. I'd never heard of The Living End, but they were pretty good none-the-less.

Now, the surprise gift I was getting that I would mention before was a puppy. My friend found out when I was trying to keep it a secret from her. *shakes fist* The puppy is a Golden Retriever and he's cute. He's a bit obnoxious, but what do you expect? He's a PUPPY! His name is Turbo.

And Xmas was AMAZING! I got a lot I wanted. I got an Anaheim Ducks jersey w/ Ryan Getzlaf's name & number. 8 tickets to upcoming Ducks games. One I will be seeing next week. An orange practice jersey, 2 seasons of Roseanne, seasons 3 & 4 of Degrassi, The Butterfly Effect, more stuff I can't remember. Oh, and 130 dollars.

But today's bad because I have a dentist appt and I do NOT like the woman who does it. I mean, she's nice, but I do not like her putting needles in my body. The last time, I could have SWORN she hit my jaw bone! But the good thing is I only have 2 cavities to fill.

Anywho, I hope everyone else had a good Xmas! I know I did! :D
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^_^ [Sunday, December 10th, 2006 @ 12:05pm]

Which hockey player would you date?

you got Ryan Getzlaf!of the anaheim ducks. who were formerly known as the mighty ducks
Take this quiz!

Quizilla |

| Make A Quiz | More Quizzes | Grab Code

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Emo Rant [Wednesday, December 6th, 2006 @ 5:58pm]
This make me smile :D

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[Saturday, November 25th, 2006 @ 11:02am]
[ mood | accomplished ]

ok so i was wrong. we didn't play the flamers, we played the mountain people (aka avalanche). but we still won which is good. we're playing the flamers tomorrow. ^_^

i really don't have much to say except that.

oh, and i'm a little sad because i know that ryan getzlaf has a girlfriend. but i don't wish ill will upon her. i hope both of them are happy. i just wish it was me though. *shrugs*

later days

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I'm stuffed! [Friday, November 24th, 2006 @ 10:19am]
[ mood | anxious ]

Yesterday was a good day. :D

unfortunately my sister didn't show up as a surprise. *shrugs* oh well.

my guinea pig getzy (i named him after my favorite hockey player ryan getzlaf) got a huge ass cage. for a while now we've been meaning to get him a bigger cage but we hadn't been able to afford it. so i come home from school and my step dad jack is all "go upstairs to the loft and clean it for you mom tomorrow" and we groaned but went upstairs and there was his huge new cage. i must say i was pretty surprised.

we also are getting...oops i can't say it yet for fear someone i know might read this and spill the beans but once is all said and done and my secret is revealed then i'll let you know on here :D

ahh! the ducks lost in a shootout on wednesday against the fucking avs! and my future husband was our last hope to win. frankly, i think we should have won regardless but that bastard refs made a TERRIBLE call against kunitz... but i digress... bastards...

but we're playing the flamers today at 1, so we better win. that's all i'm saying..

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Turkey Day! [Wednesday, November 22nd, 2006 @ 2:07pm]
[ mood | i need to poop! ]

yay! it's wednesday! i'm so excited. i get to sleep in tomorrow. :D

then i get to eat delicious squash casserole. yummu. *licks lips* it may sound gross. that's what i thought when i first heard about it. but once you've tasted it.. you never go back. *sigh*

anywho, to get on a disgusting topic, i REALLY have to go to the bathroom right now. i think i'm going to EXPLODE!


my mom is saying that my older sister nikki isn't going to be able to make it to thanksgiving, but i'm really hoping she's just going to surprise us but i highly doubt it. oh well.

so apparently a kid at my school had a seizure. they're saying he od'ed. our-i don't know what you call them..-yard duty? anywho, a guy kino apparently saved his life by putting his finger in the kids mouth and pulling out the food that was choking him. scary. also he messed his head because when he had his seizure he felll down and hit his head on the concrete. his head then bounced up and hit the ground again. eek.

oh and my friend brittany was telling me yesterday that she had a gun pulled on her. long story short, some theif ran into one of her classrooms and because she doesn't have a class that period was walking with a friend when a cop pulled a gun on her and yelled at her to get into class. scary.

i probably would have crapped my pants.

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[Tuesday, November 21st, 2006 @ 1:59pm]
So, yesterday I find out I didn't make the musical. I'm kinda upset because I REALLY wanted to make it, but I knew I wouldn't. My singing audition sucked (i couldn't remember the lyrics) and I couldn't remember the dance moves for the dancing audition.

but on the bright side I can now get a job. I'm thinking of appyling at Kohl's, but the idea of an interview scares me to death. It's funny how I can go to auditions for plays or musical, but interviewing for a job scares the crap out of me.

oh well.

this comes up randomly in my head a lot, but I AM GOING TO MARRY RYAN GETZLAF IF IT'S THE LAST THING I DO :D

Yeah... right...

anywho, I should probably head out. i'm at school and i'm not supposed to be on the computer unless it's school work. and what do you know? it's not!


peace out!

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Top Ramen Stir Fry [Friday, November 17th, 2006 @ 1:59pm]
so we made a stir fry in foods. It was actually pretty good. It consisted of chicken, carrots, broccoli, and top ramen. I wasn't too big on the carrots, but it was still pretty good.

we took our huge senior photo today in the gym. the fucking photographer took a picture of my back! see, that way it works is we took about 3 pictures just smiling all nice and sitting down. then the third we ca can go crazy. i was in the process of standing up on the on bleachers (i had to catch my balance) and out of the corner of my eye i saw a flash and the guy is like "ok we're done!"

I was like... You son of a bitch! LOL I didn't actually say it, but I thought it..

and for some reason I was REALLY hyper during lunch joking around w/ joanna and dayna, which i NEVER really do. It was crazy. All I can say about that is.. I want a non-biting rapping penguin. that's all i'll say...
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